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New Years Resolutions

January is a time for goals, a time for recommitment, a time for fresh starts. Whereas a month ago visions of sugar plums danced in your head (and brownies, pie, ham, and pizza), this month your dreams will revolve around slimmer waistlines, a cleaner house, and a better relationship with your in-laws. These dreams, if realized, will obviously alter your life for the better. What is not so obvious is the unforeseen benefits of these decisions. Even further: There is sometimes a direct correlation between new years resolutions and pest control benefits. Consider a few examples:

You’ve decided to be more active, so you’ve bought a Fitbit to measure how many steps you’ve been taking. To get more steps, you’ve decided to do more yard work. Certainly you’ll mow the lawn more regularly than you ever have before, and you’ll trim the trees and shrubs religiously. With a more ship-shape landscape, you’ll have less harborage for rodents, spiders and insects. In addition, your landscape will be the toast of the neighborhood. Your newfound fame will land you on the ballot for Governor…dare I say the presidency in 2020?

Bottom line, if you’ve decided to lose weight, you’re going to eat a lot less. If you eat less, you’ll have more time (have you ever timed how long it takes to eat a bag of chips? It’s not insignificant. Also people don’t normally figure in the food coma nap that inevitably follows). With more time, you can seal up some of those areas around the house that could prevent infestations. Undoubtedly you’d get news screens for your windows to prevent flying insects from coming inside. Surely you’d get new door sweeps installed that would not only make your home more efficient but you’d also prevent crawling spiders and insects from entering your home. With a more efficient home, you’ll end up getting attention from HGTV, where you will land a multi-million dollar contract for your own show that you’ll title: “From Chips to Joanna Efficiency Gaines”.

As you eat right in 2019, you’ll eat less cookies. As you eat less cookies, there will be less crumbs that drops out of your mouth. If there are less crumbs on the ground, there will be no food on the ground for ants, mice, or cockroaches to eat. Your spick and span home will completely eliminate your mother in law’s criticism that you’re ‘no good’. With newfound self esteem, you’ll exude confidence. You’ll go back to school, get your doctorate, and write widely cited scholarly papers on the effects of floor crumbs in family life. The Nobel Prize is not out of the question.

These are just a few of the examples that I’ve seen.

Please stick to your 2019 goals. As you do, you’ll come to realize that not only will your clothes fit better and home be cleaner, your home will be more pest-free…then who knows what’s possible? Some doubters may believe that some of this article is far-fetched, and I suppose that’s fair. In the internet age I can’t expect you to believe ALL that you read online. If you must, get some insurance and call Barrier Pest Control. If you do, I can promise you, like the great philosopher Pedro once said: All of your dreams will come true.

CC image by Carol at Flickr